This should be required education for every man on the planet. The payoff will alter your sexual experiences forever.
-Tim Ferriss, The 4 Hour Body
One of my good friends likes to tell his friends about a specific hobby of mine. It always gets them very curious about me.
This hobby of mine is kind of shocking to most people.
It’s abnormal. It’s crazy. And it’s sexual. All at the same time.
Because every time my friend tells someone about it, they always have questions for me.
“What’s it like?”
“Why do you do it?”
And after they ask those questions, they always ask me one more:
“What’s it called again?”
Yes, meditation mixed with orgasms—female orgasms to be precise.
It’s done with a partner—between a man and a woman.
And it goes down like this:
The man sets up a little area of pillows and blankets so that the woman is comfortable. (It’s called “the nest.”)
The woman takes off JUST her pants and lies on the pillows.
There’s a small amount of prep work. The man then gets into position and strokes her clitoris in the upper-left-hand quadrant for 15 minutes.
Both parties then tell each other about a moment where they felt a sensation in their body during the meditation.
Afterwards, they get up and go their separate ways.
I know, I know… you’re probably thinking I’m crazy. That’s okay.
Orgasmic Meditation is “out there” and it’s not for everyone.
But after doing this for a couple of months, I’ve realized some things about myself, particularly about my sexuality as a man.
I’ve realized that there are benefits beyond the surface level that have had an impact on the way I show up in my relationships with women.
Again, maybe it sounds a little weird. You might be wondering, “How is stroking the clit of a random woman beneficial? This sounds like some perverted sexual practice that hippies do as an excuse to touch each other.”
I get it. I’ll explain.
Here are the 7 reasons why practicing orgasmic meditation has helped me in my relationships with women… and why it might be a good idea for you and your relationships—with women and yourself.
Reason #1. You’ll attract more sexual women.
“Would you like to OM?” (OM is short-hand for “orgasmic meditation”, pronounced “ohm.”)
This is the go-to question to ask someone if you’d like to practice with him or her (asked by either the man or woman). There’s no attachment. I can say yes or no, without needing to provide any explanation. Any reason is OK. And the community encourages this.
There was an instance where one particular woman asked me to practice with her. I wasn’t attracted to her, so I felt hesitant to say yes.
I’m glad I said yes.
Even though I wasn’t attracted to her, I learned something much more important in doing this session with her.
Many normal women are actually more attractive than some of the model-looking girls that I’ve met.
They’ve developed their sexuality. And as a consequence, they’re more comfortable expressing it.
I’ll be honest with you.
A woman’s physical appearance is important to me in regards to my romantic relationships. I love being attracted to my partner. I love knowing that she takes care of her body through exercise and healthy living. This isn’t to say that only attractive people do this – but appearance often points out these positive choices in the women I date.
Regardless, appearance isn’t the whole picture. In fact, it’s only a fraction of it.
And OMing with a woman that I wasn’t attracted to showed me that a woman’s sexual energy is a much larger slice of the pie than I originally thought.
This was hard for me to internalize and learn.
But after OMing, I’m more in tune with that feeling. I can tell right away now whether a woman “has it” or doesn’t.
On the flip side, if I meet a physically beautiful woman without that aura of feminine, raw sexual energy, I’m not interested in dating her.
2. You’ll learn to appreciate women as they are in reality, not as the media makes them out to be.
I’ll admit it. Putting myself in the described scenario wasn’t the easiest thing for me to do.
It triggered a lot of negative emotions in me.
“Ew, this is gross. I’m not attracted to her whatsoever.”
“Ew, this is gross.”
“Ew, this is gross.”
But then it came up for me – why was it gross? Because she’s overweight? Because I’m not physically attracted to her? Because she’s not “hot”?
Yes and yes, but most importantly, I realized one thing that had a PROFOUND effect on the way I looked at myself:
I tied my value as a man to the physical beauty of the woman I was with.
It’s one thing to not to want to be her OM’ing partner, but it’s another to feel disgusted about doing it.
That thought alone made me realize how fucked up that thinking is.
I know some of the guys reading this are the same way (perhaps even some of you women). But I also know it’s usually involuntary. It just… happens.
Well, after doing this orgasmic meditation practice 8 or 9 times with many different women, some who are physically beautiful and some who aren’t, I’ve come to realize that it’s far more important to connect with all women. Appreciate each and every one of them.
Because women are amazing as they are in real life, not in airbrushed images and porn.
3. You’ll feel alive and you’ll remember that doing weird things are fun.
I can’t fully explain the feeling of having come back from this “meditative practice” where I’ve just met some random woman two times my age, and then leave having done this orgasmic meditation. It’s surreal.
I always leave thinking “is this real life?” with a big smile on my face.
Most importantly, I’m fulfilling my curiosity. Many people reading this might see this as some weird sexual act where guys go for their own “twisted satisfaction.” But I’ll encourage them, just as I encourage you to understand: there’s much more to it.
Now whenever I feel intrigued about something, I want to try it. I don’t care if it’s weird, or stupid, or “too out there”.
I want to live a life of adventure and challenge, and now I do. Because doing weird things is fun.
4. Make sure to blink a lot…or you’ll lose sight (WARNING: hilarity ensues)
During one of my OM sessions, something funny happened. I was intently focused on finding the right spot to help her reach orgasm, and as soon as I found the spot, it happened…
My left contact lens fell out of my eye and landed right between her legs.
The thoughts that started going through my head:
“Shit, I can’t see”
“Am I touching the right spot?”
“My contact just landed on her lady parts. Did she feel it?”
“Can I even use this contact anymore?”
“WAIT, MY CONTACT IS ON HER PUSSY. GAHHHHHH”
“I have to tell someone about this. This is hilarious.”
I was freaking out, laughing, and trying to focus all at the same time.
But I continued for the rest of the 15-minute session, and luckily, the contact was still in-tact and right next to me.
So, lesson learned: make sure to blink in life. Don’t focus so much you’re going crazy. Cause you might lose your sight…
And if you do lose sight of things, laugh about it and get back on track. Just like the eye contact on the pussy.
Sounds like a good life lesson to me.
And yes, for all those wondering. I did use my contact again. Afterwards, another stroker offered me his contact solution and it was all good to go. I made sure to wash it 10x over, so don’t fret…
Ugh, I know it’s gross, but seriously…you gotta do what you gotta do. Contacts are expensive.
5. You’ll learn how to “calibrate” with the women around you
If you’ve read any books in the dating advice industry, you’ve probably heard the term “calibration”. It’s the ability to match your vibe with the woman you’re with so that you can better connect with her.
Orgasmic Meditation helps you do that in real time without getting rudely rejected in a public place.
Well, during my time in the practice, I’ve OM’d with women of all different ages.
I’ve OM’d with women in their late 20’s, I’ve OM’d with women in their 30’s, and I’ve OM’d with women that are in their 40’s and 50’s.
Each woman, regardless of age, has a certain energy (or “vibe”) that they give off.
Sometimes it’s a wise, mature feminine energy, and sometimes it’s a young, vibrant feminine energy.
And after noticing both on a much deeper level than I’m used to experiencing, I’m more capable of matching that energy.
For example, now if I go to a party, I better understand which women are more interested in going deep in conversation quickly or who would rather be more playful and dance around.
Whichever mood they’re in is great, and now I know how to connect with them on that level on which they want to connect.
In terms of social skills, calibration is right near the top of the list — and OMing helps you develop it.
6. If you feel something, so did she.
When you feel attracted to a woman, she feels attracted back…as long as it’s an authentic feeling.
In my program Initiation, I call this the “magnetic theory of authentic attraction”.
What do I mean by that? I’ll give you an example from OM.
There was a moment with one of my partners where at one point during the session, things got REALLY hot. Her hand squeezed my hand as she started moaning louder. And naturally I was turned on.
After the session, I looked at her and said: that was hot. She smiled and laughed back and agreed, thoroughly exhausted from her orgasm.
But here’s the thing: other partners of mine moaned a lot. They were just as beautiful.
But I didn’t FEEL anything. It was totally mental. I’d think to myself:
“Oh, this girl is moaning. Sweet, I must be doing something right”.
Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.
Because with my partner whom I had a huge connection with, when I hit the right spot, I felt it immediately. As did she. And that’s not something that can be interpreted by words. It’s that natural gut feeling you get when something really turns you on.
In the OM community, they call this a “frame of sensation” – a moment where something happens in your body – not in your mind.
The lesson here is that if you feel attracted towards a woman, and it’s an actual gut feeling – not just because she’s ‘hot’ – then the chances are: she feels it too.
Good chemistry takes two to tango, and you can’t fake that.
Next time you get that gut feeling when you’re talking with a woman, try assuming she’s feeling it too, so long as the attraction is coming from your body, not your head.
When you feel it, escalate your relationship with her. Ask her out. Kiss her. Whatever feels right in the moment.
7. You’ll increase your confidence with women and with work
Hell, as the guy in this situation, I don’t even take my pants off. I’m just focusing on the woman and her pleasure.
And I STILL feel the benefits.
When that sexual energy between my partner and me builds, it fuels my day.
Napoleon Hill summarizes the benefits in his classic book Think And Grow Rich:Sex desire is the most powerful of human desires.
“When driven by this desire, men develop keenness of imagination, courage, will-power, persistence, and creative ability unknown to them at other times. So strong and impelling is the desire for sexual contact that men freely run the risk of life and reputation to indulge it. When harnessed, and redirected along other lines, this motivating force maintains all of its attributes of keenness of imagination, courage, etc., which may be used as powerful creative forces in literature, art, or in any other profession or calling, including, of course, the accumulation of riches.”
When we polarize our sexuality in our actions towards the world, we show up passionately. And when we show up passionately, we’re fulfilled.
Think about it like this…
Have you ever felt drained after ejaculating too much? It’s no surprise. Your sexual energy is depleted.
But when there’s a practice like OM, we as guys can build up that energy in a positive environment that doesn’t leave us drained afterwards.
This is sexual transmutation at it’s finest. And it’s powerful.
Sure, Orgasmic Meditation may be “way out there.” And perhaps it sounds very “woo woo”. I realize that it’s uncomfortable for a lot of people to grasp and would be difficult to do. I get it.
But that’s the point.
It helps us break through sexual shame, understand our feelings around sex, take a different perspective on attraction, and work on our insecurities.
If you’re interested, then take an Orgasmic Meditation class. See what works for you.
What do you think of Orgasmic Meditation? Have you tried it before and have you seen benefits? Do you think it’s too crazy? Let me know in the comments!Join Over 10,000 Monthly Readers And Subscribe Today
Get My FREE 4-Part Course “On Becoming a More Exceptional Man”, Exclusive Updates, and my Bonus Action Hack Guide
December 18th, 2013 | Max Nachamkin | 22 Comments |
About The Author
My name is Max Nachamkin. My mission is to help you master the core three aspects of your life: your career, your health, and your relationships. I want you to conquer your own world and become the leader of your life.
- The Ultimate Guide To Body Language For Men
- The Nice Guy's Guide to Demanding Respect (Without Being An Asshole)
- The Introvert's Guide to Living Truthfully Pt 2/3 – 5 Techniques to Socialize in an Extroverted World
- How to Give Women What They Really Want ft. Christian Hudson
- The 5 (Biggest) Self-Directed Leadership Mistakes You Don't Know You're Making
- Are You a Nice Guy? How to Be a Good Guy Instead
- How To Never Get Sick (And Add 72,000 Hours To Your Life)
- The Inner Gladiator Podcast Ep 1 – The Trustable Man ft. Damien Diecke
Get My FREE 4-Part Course "On Becoming a More Exceptional Man", Exclusive Updates, and my Bonus Action Hack Guide
Most Popular Articles
Follow IG on Facebook!
Inner Gladiator (c) 2013